If you do not spend each and every day with your kids at home then you have probably asked a stay at home mom some of these questions at one time or another.

“What do you do all day?” or “It must be so nice to get to stay home all day.”

My husband has even been asked on occasion, “Why doesn’t your wife go out and get a job?



Being a SAHM is Hard Work

But most people don’t realize that being a stay at home mom is in no way an EASY task. It is a job in itself. Between keeping the house tidy (or at least trying), the whining children, and the piles of dirty clothes and dishes you have to keep up with, it can become very overwhelming.

Just trying to keep your sanity is a task in itself. I am failing miserably at this!

Although there are many people who think being a stay at home mom means you get to sit on your butt all day, watch soap operas and stuff your face while your kids run wild tearing up the house. In fact, the complete opposite is true. I have no time to even look at a TV let alone sit down and watch a show.

As a stay at home mom, I work twice as hard and twice as long as my husband who has a full-time job. I am on call 24/7 and never get to clock out. Even when my husband is home the kids call “Mom.”I am often the last one to sit down to a meal and even then I have to help the baby with his food.

But still, many stay-at-home moms are not recognized for the work they do all day. I myself have had a few family members imply that I am not working hard enough as a stay at home mom because I do not bring in a paycheck. Whereas if they were to add up all of the tasks I perform each day, they would not have enough to pay me for the hours I work.


1. Why Is Your House Messy?

What do you do all day? Do You Own a Vacuum Cleaner?

Yes, I do and it’s in the hall closet if you want to grab it and vacuum my floor yourself. What most people don’t realize is that staying home all day with your kids doesn’t mean you can just sit around and eat ice-cream while watching Game Of Thrones. HaHa.

My house is messy because as soon as I get one room cleaned up and spotless, I find another room that my kids have redecorated with toys all over the floor. I am outnumbered two and sometimes three to one (when my hubby is home) and I cannot keep everything in perfect order all of the time.

And if you’ve got furry pets at home you have an even harder time keeping it clean. Getting rid of pet hair is not as easy as you think.

Related: The Truth About Parenting with Depression & Anxiety

2. Oh, So You Don’t Work?

Yes, I do work all day and sometimes through the endless night. I am also working different jobs all at once.

  • I am making three meals a day plus snacks in between
  • Changing diapers
  • Changing clothes
  • Washing dishes
  • Washing and Folding Laundry
  • Taking children to and from school
  • Grocery shopping with a screaming child that wants a cookie.
  • Breaking up fights over who had a toy first
  • Breastfeeding the baby
  • Cleaning the house
  • Changing sheets
  • Paying Bills
  • Wiping bottoms and noses
  • Kissing Boo-boos and owies
  • Putting kids down for a nap
  • Giving baths
  • And sometimes I am able to find time to go to the bathroom (but never by myself).


3. When Are You Going Back to Work?

“Going Back? When did I leave?”

I am working Fulltime as a Mommy. It is the hardest job I have ever had in my life. I am on call at any time day or night. I am not allowed any sick days or holidays off and am never guaranteed a full night’s sleep or even an uninterrupted nap. Being a Stay-at-Home Mom is a very tiring and often unrecognized, unappreciated, and underpaid career.

4. I Could NOT Stay at Home All Day. I Have to be Doing Something

Doing Something? I don’t ever stop doing something!

I am on the move all day. My kids have a special radar that tells them anytime I sit down or start to catch my breath so they can find me and put me back to work.

Also, many moms choose to stay at home with their children because childcare costs an arm and a leg. For one child it’s anywhere from $100 or more per week. And if you have more than one child, you are likely paying double that or even more.

5. Why Didn’t You Get This Done? It’s Not Like You Work.

“You have got to be joking. I haven’t even eaten yet”

When something does not get done it is not because I was slacking off or being lazy. It is because I barely have time to breathe or at times think.

I mean I am lucky that I am dressed right now!

Even making a simple phone call is a challenge with shrieking children surrounding me and pulling at my pants leg.

I have often told people who have asked me this question, “I will leave you at home with all of the kids and a huge list of chores to do so you can see how hard it is to get everything done.”

It is not just taking care of the house or taking care of the kids. Being a stay at home mom means being a wife, mommy, nurse, and peacekeeper all at once.

6. Your Husband Has been Working All Day, He Needs to Sit Down and Relax

“He needs to relax? What about me? When is my sick day or vacation?”

I have been running around every day seven days a week for over five years. I have worked while I was pregnant, sick, and even depressed. For me, a day to relax or even five minutes to myself would be amazing.

6 things you should never say to a stay at home mom

This last year, my husband had just started to realize all of the tasks I am juggling throughout the day and is now trying to help me when he comes home from work.

Just because stay at home moms do not get paid for all that they do does not mean they do not deserve to take a break now and then.

Experts have said that with all of the work that stay at home moms accomplish each day they should earn over $100,000 in salaries. Man! Wouldn’t that be nice?

If you are a stay-at-home mom have you had any insensitive comments? If so, leave them down below. I would love to hear about your experiences.

6 Things You Should NEVER Say to a Stay-at-Home-Mom

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